12 Tips to Keep a Tinder Conversation Going [W/ Examples]

Have you ever matched with someone on Tinder, only to find the conversation fizzling out after a few messages? 

It's a common problem many users face. 

You might struggle with finding the right topics to discuss, or perhaps you’re worried about coming off too strong or too boring. And with all the contradicting tips you might come across online, texting can feel like a daunting task rather than an enjoyable interaction.

The good news is that keeping a Tinder conversation going doesn’t have to be an uphill battle. 

With the right strategies, you can transform those awkward chats into engaging conversations that keep both parties interested and excited to talk. 

In this article, we’ll share practical tips and tricks to ensure your Tinder conversations never lose their spark. 

12 Tips to Make the Conversation on Tinder Going

Getting matches on Tinder is one thing, but keeping the conversation going is a different challenge. 

While a lack of skills might result in losing a match, a good texting game can even make the other person fall in love with you.

These 13 tips will help you keep things interesting and increase your chances of taking it from the app to an actual date.

#1. Make a Great First Impression

Your opening line on Tinder sets the tone for the entire conversation, so you want it to be a good one. Without a strong opening line, the interaction might not last for long.

Using a cheesy pick-up line or sending a bland "hey" is basic and won't leave an impression.

You’re texting someone you haven’t yet met, so take a minute to read their bio and look at their photos. Then, comment on something specific that caught your eye. Did you go to the same college? Share a quirky interest? See a funny pet photo?

If creativity isn’t your strong suit, try something witty. A good sense of humor is incredibly appealing, so if you can make your match smile right away, you’re more likely to keep the conversation going.

#2. Inquire About Their Interests

Many people believe they need to present themselves in the best light possible. However, you can easily make it seem like you only want to talk about yourself, even if that's not your intention. 

So, once you've broken the ice, your next move is to show genuine interest in your match. Ask them about their hobbies, passions, jobs, or anything else they seem excited about.

People generally enjoy talking about themselves and the things they care about. Asking your match about their interests keeps the dialogue flowing and makes it easier to find common ground to connect over. 

In addition, you might want to know what your match is looking for on Tinder. That way, you’ll know how to navigate the conversation.

#3. Ask Open-Ended Questions

A lot of conversations die out because they're not engaging enough. Asking only close-ended questions quickly becomes boring and makes the other person feel like they're being interviewed. 

So, how should you approach the conversation?

Start asking open-ended questions that cannot be simply answered with "yes" or "no." They usually start with "why," "how," or "what" and express the desire to get to know the other person on a deeper level.

Your match's lengthy response will give you plenty more to work with to continue the conversation. 

There are numerous topics you can talk about, so remember, the more insightful questions you ask, the more you'll learn about them.

#4. Bring up Common Interests

If you share certain hobbies, favorite travel destinations, sports team allegiances, niche interests, or anything else in common, definitely bring it up!

Find mutual interests or experiences to deepen connection; it instantly gives you both plenty to relate to and riff on together. Also, optimize your Tinder profile; it’s the easiest way to inform potential matches about your interests even before the conversation starts.

Bonding over shared passions is an easy way to keep the conversation flowing while establishing common ground. You'll quickly go from strangers to having an "us" mentality.

#5. Be Flirty (But Not Too Flirty)

Many people on Tinder are looking either to hook up or find a partner. While some users are just looking for friends, they are still a minority.

That being said, you shouldn't be afraid of flirting. After all, you’re both there to find a partner, so flirting is more than welcome.

However, don't be too flirty. While a sprinkle of flirtatious banter can turn up the heat, overdoing it or being too sexual will do the opposite.

Simply compliment your match on something you find attractive about their personality or physical traits.

You can also tease them playfully or make subtle jokes. Just be sure to also focus on substantive conversation.

For more tips on flirting on Tinder, check out our guide!

#6. Make the Next Step

Another common reason Tinder conversations fizzle out is that people stay in the “texting phase” for too long. To avoid losing another match, try to take things to the next level sooner rather than later.

After all, no matter if you’re into finding a relationship or getting a one-night stand, the ultimate goal of chatting on Tinder is to meet up in person eventually, right?

When the timing feels right, invite your Tinder date for a drink. Then, if they seem interested, suggest swapping numbers to discuss logistics.

If they decline, be understanding and don’t push it. It’s likely better to wait until they’re ready to meet on their terms. However, if they show no interest in meeting up at all, it might be time to continue searching for the right match.

#7. Follow up after the Date

Once you’ve been on the date, you can consider this connection a successful Tinder match. However, that still doesn’t mean you're done putting effort into continuing the conversation online.

So, don't forget to text your match the day after or right after the date.

You can simply thank them for having a good time, or you can also reference something specific you chatted about on the date as a conversational springboard.

Remember, while being clingy is a turn-off, consistent communication is key to turning that Tinder match into something more serious. The app may have sparked the initial flame, but it's up to you both to keep it.

#8. Switch to a Different Platform

While the Tinder chat is good for the beginning, it lacks some features, such as sending photos or direct replies. So, switching over to texting or social media DMs is the next step.

Furthermore, this means your match feels comfortable enough to provide you with their phone number or social media profiles, which indicates they’re open to taking things further. 

Moving to another platform makes your interaction more intimate, which helps you progress the relationship. It's a natural next step that shows you want to get to know them better.

#9. Share Your Personal Stories

Don't just keep the conversation on the surface. There's so much you don’t know about each other, which means you have a lot of stuff to share.

You can take things deeper by sharing anecdotes and personal stories that reveal more about your values, background, and what makes you tick. 

Maybe tell a funny childhood memory, recount an embarrassing dating fail, or discuss a challenging life experience you overcame. It'll make them laugh and help them get to know the real you beyond just your Tinder bio.

Just try to keep the natural pace and don't share too many heavy details too soon.

#10. Start Sending Pictures

So, you've been chatting for a while and concluded it's the right time to make things more intimate. How do you do it? 

You can start sprinkling in some photos to give them a better glimpse into your daily life. Snap a pic of the scenic hiking trail you're on, the delicious meal you cooked, your adorable pet—anything that gives them a window into your world. Visuals make the conversations feel more dynamic, personal, and humanizing.

Sharing photos is a step towards deeper intimacy, as you're inviting them into the private space of your life experiences. Remember, your goal is to make them feel like they're getting to know the real, multidimensional you.

#11. Initiate Another Date

If the first date went well, don't wait too long to ask for the second date! Letting too much time lapse can kill the momentum and let that initial spark fizzle out, which may leave you ghosted.

Take the initiative and suggest some concrete activity ideas that align with what you know about their interests so far. This shows you were paying attention to who they are as a person, not just mindlessly planning another generic drink night.

Additionally, knowing when to suggest a next date isn't enough; you should know how to do it. Proposing a vague "Do you want to hang out again sometime?" lacks intentional energy and doesn't seem enthusiastic. 

So, be proactive. Having an actual plan shows your effort, enthusiasm, and thoughtfulness—major green flags. It gets you both excited to reunite and pick up where you left off. 

#12. Spice It up

Is your goal to get laid on Tinder? Once the flirty vibe is flowing, it's cool to turn up the heat over text.

Don't overthink it or wait for some big milestone date. If the chemistry is strong, go for it! Tease them with a suggestive comment, drop a mildly dirty joke, or get a little role-play going if you're both feeling frisky.

The key is checking their reaction. If they're matching your energy and playing along, that's your green light to get sexier. But if you sense any hesitation or awkwardness, ease off and don't push it. You both have to be into it before taking things there.

Wanna take your online dating experience to the next level? Then read our guide on how to get more matches on Tinder!

Why do Conversations Fizzle Out (And What to Do)?

Online dating runs at an extremely fast pace. Most people have more than one match, which means they have to keep the conversation going with several people at once. This kind of juggling isn’t sustainable, so they either don’t have the time to respond, they forget to, or they simply choose to engage with another match.

If your Tinder match's responses are brief and late, lack additional interaction, and have stopped asking questions about you or your life, it's a clear sign that things aren't going well and that the discussion is dying.

So what can you do to try to revive a dying discussion?

First, resist the urge to double or triple text; that comes across as needy and pushy. Instead, send one last engaging, open-ended question about their interests or a flirty remark to reignite their attention.

If they still don't make an effort after that, it may be time to move on. Know when to cut your losses and put your efforts into matches that still show enthusiasm.

Do you want to reignite the spark of the conversation that fizzled out some time ago? Read our guide on how to text someone you haven’t talked to in a while.

6 Worst Texting Mistakes

Your match may lose interest for reasons beyond your control—maybe they hit it off better with someone else or simply got overwhelmed juggling multiple conversations.

However, some common texting mistakes can sabotage your chances before you even get the opportunity for a date. Avoiding these pitfalls will help you make a better impression and keep your match intrigued.

#1. Not Knowing How and When to Get Sexual

Introducing sexual tension and intimacy is an art that many people are not good at.

Getting overtly sexual too soon without any buildup makes you seem creepy and desperate. Crude remarks or explicit messages right out of the gate are a sure turn-off before you've even had a chance to establish any real connection or chemistry.

The key is gradually escalating the flirtatious banter once you've gotten to know each other. Read the cues and watch for the feedback. Is your match mirroring your suggestiveness? If they're not matching your energy, don't be that pushy guy who can't take a hint.

#2. Talking About Yourself All the Time

Conversations require balance; it shouldn't be all about you. 

You’ll seem selfish If every response is a long-winded monologue about your day, job, hobbies, and accomplishments without trying to learn something about them.

Just like a Tinder SuperLike signals special interest, you should aim to show it over messages. Ask questions, show interest in their opinion and perspective, and listen to their responses rather than waiting for your turn to talk again. 

#3. Giving Too Many Compliments

A well-timed, sincere compliment, letting your match know you appreciate something about them, can go a long way.

But if every other message is some gushing adoration about their looks, it comes across as disingenuous or love-bombing. It makes you seem insincere like you're just saying what you think they want to hear to get something from them.

Constant superficial compliments suggest you're more infatuated with the idea of them than the real person they are; it simply feels hollow and one-dimensional.

Additionally, putting a girl on a pedestal will make you look like a simp, which you don’t want.

#4. Being Too Pushy

While you want to keep conversations engaging and continually move things forward, don't come on too strong or too fast. Remember, you're still strangers at this stage. Pushing for a level of intimacy or personal information they're still not comfortable with can kill the vibe.

That being said, avoid overtexting them with rapid-firing a million questions that seem like an interrogation. Don't expect them to respond at lightning speed or get annoyed over delayed replies. And do not bug them if they've gone quiet for a while; they may just be busy.

Long story short – don't rush the pace or force a level of closeness they aren't ready for.

Match their engagement level and let the closeness build naturally over time. Being too pushy screams desperation and is a major red flag. 

#5. Playing Hard to Get

While a little mystery can be intriguing, playing too hard to get can backfire.

If you're always delaying responses, keeping your messages short, or leaving them on read, the other person might think you're not interested and move on.

So, try to be responsive and show genuine interest in what the other person has to say. It's important to strike a balance between being available and maintaining a bit of intrigue without seeming uninterested.

Playing hard to get should be about creating a playful challenge, not about creating frustration or disinterest.

#6. Not Being Confident

Having a self-assured, authentic voice and not being afraid to tease or be vulnerable is extremely attractive.

Avoid any self-deprecating humor or constantly apologizing for existing. Insecurity is a major turn-off that quickly becomes draining.

The right match won't be put off by your honest self-confidence, so never sell yourself short. However, don't mistake confidence for arrogance; you still want to find a fine balance.

One of the things that can lower your confidence is having no likes on Tinder. To keep your online dating game strong, read our article and learn how to fix it.

How Can You Tell They’re Genuinely Interested?

Wondering if the person you're texting is genuinely interested in you

You can find out! Here are some signs to look out for:

  • Prompt responses: They reply to your messages quickly and consistently, showing they're eager to keep the conversation going.
  • Engaging questions: They ask you questions about yourself, your interests, and your day.
  • Thoughtful replies: Their responses are thoughtful and detailed, and they’re invested in the conversation.
  • Initiating contact: They don't just wait for you to text first; they initiate conversations as well.
  • Using emojis and GIFs: They use emojis and GIFs to express themselves, making the conversation more lively and fun.
  • Compliments and positive language: They genuinely compliment you and use positive language.
  • Making plans: They suggest meeting up and planning activities with you.
  • Recalling details: They remember little things you've mentioned in previous conversations, showing they pay attention to what you say.
  • Frequent updates: They share updates about their day or significant events.
  • Teasing and playfulness: They engage in playful teasing and light-hearted banter, to show they feel at ease with you.
  • Consistent effort: They consistently put effort into the conversation, even during busy times.
  • Sharing personal stories: They share personal stories and experiences, opening up to you and fostering a deeper connection.
  • Expressing interest in your hobbies: They show interest in your hobbies and might even suggest doing something related to them together.
  • Good morning/good night texts: This shows you're on their mind at the start and end of their day.

Did your Tinder match disappear? Here’s what might’ve happened.

Conclusion

Keeping a Tinder conversation lively and engaging not only shows genuine interest but also increases your chances of having a successful online dating experience. 

By focusing on these key aspects and avoiding the most common mistakes, you will ensure that your Tinder matches develop into deeper connections and real-life encounters. 

Remember, every conversation is an opportunity to discover more about someone else, so keep it enjoyable and let the dialogue flow naturally.

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